Let me just start by saying , I love my kids and my husband with all my heart. They are literally my whole world and my entire being, but sometimes I just want to be alone. I don’t want to be summoned 100 times in 2 minutes. I need to forget about all my responsibilities and I need a minimum of 30 minutes (more is a HUGE bonus) to just NOT be touched!
The main thing we as mama’s need to get over is feeling guilty when we want, need or take time to ourselves. Yes, we decided to have kids (or in some peoples case God gifted us with a wonderful Surprise.) Yes, I know I am blessed beyond measure. Yes, I know these moments are fleeting and I will miss the crazy yelling, fighting and chaos. I get it. I promise I do. Most of the time I love these moments and find the beauty of them. Other times I am just human and I lose my shit. I cry and even sob. These moments are when I know I need to take sometime for me and get the heck away from the house. By myself where no one calls me MOOOooooM!
I am thankful my husband loves me at my breaking points and recognizes when I need to get away. I am forever grateful for that. In return he gets to go fishing “almost” anytime he wants and I try to be as understanding even on my worse days. However, I am realistic and I know not everyone has the same kind of arrangements. I get it that we are all in different walks of life, work different schedules, are single moms, have husbands who work out of town.
Call in the forces sister! Find some amazing babysitters, (it’s worth the money to have some sanity), give grandma or whatever she is called now a days a call, call a sibling, best friend, neighbor, Sunday school friend. Who ever it is CALL THEM! Tell them it’s life or death. Make a schedule with your best friend and watch her kids for a day and then she can do the same for you. Just make it happen. YOU ARE IMPORTANT!
Here are some of my favorite things to do when I get time to indulge in myself. Guys sometimes all that means is 30 minutes, or a day, or a weekend! Take what you can get and make the best of it.
- Walk through a bookstore. I love finding used bookstores and just rummaging through the shelves. I am one of those quirky weird people who love the smell of books. ❤
- Find a coffee shop, ask the Barista to make a pretty latte, sit in silence and JUST BREATHE. AHHhhhhhhh
- Pack your favorite blanket (mine is an old quilt that I actually keep in my car), go to your favorite park, sit under a tree and read! Fresh air, Sunshine and a book does wonders for the soul.
- Find a yoga class and go to that shit as much as possible. I mean that in the most Zen way possible. Do it and then come back and thank me and tell me how wonderful it was!
- Look into your local art society and see when they have open art nights. Even if art isn’t “your thing” sometimes walking and looking at others peoples art in galleries can give you a new perspective. If you are like me and art is your thing. You can spend 20 minutes staring at a piece of work that speaks to you as you examine every feeling you may be feeling. (Told you I quirky, but it’s totally endearing I promise)
- RUN! Sweat. Walk Fast whatever works for you and your body. Get your heartrate up, burn those endorphins and take an amazzzing shower afterward.
- Walk through thrift stores. I love going and rummaging through other peoples junk and finding little treasures. It’s also quiet and can be very relaxing.
- Get in your car, drive to your closet “drive in”, get a soda or milkshake, and call your best friend, your momma, your sister or cousin. Call your person and vent. Then let them vent. Just getting away and having someone to talk to can leave you refreshed and ready to go back home and take on the world.
If you don’t take care of yourself then you won’t ever be able to be fully at your best for your husband and kids. Don’t ever let yourself feel guilty for doing things for you. We spend all of our time taking care of others. At home, at work, at school, where you volunteer and ALL of those things are wonderful. But just think of how much better they will be when you are fully charged and feeling your very best!
Light and Love,